Ball Ball Ball!
Q: Which football team is made up of players who are all a bit ill?
A: Man Flunited.
Thursday, 11 February 2010
Wednesday, 10 February 2010
Nom nom nom nom
Q: Why was the man, who had recently eaten a load of food, feeling grumpy?
A: Because he had just been fed up.
Monday, 8 February 2010
"You walk with Jesus..."
In TV show The Wire, I can't remember the name of Avon Barksdale's right hand man but his face does ring a bell.
Wednesday, 3 February 2010
Monday, 1 February 2010
Music Video Directors To My Ears!
Q) What lotion does Kevin Godley use to make him laugh?
A: LOL Creme.
Esoteric link alert.
Sunday, 31 January 2010
Hit TV Pitch
Did you hear about Channel 4's new show in which farmers go to each others harvests and secretly rate each other?
It's called 'Combine With Me'.
Friday, 29 January 2010
Hola
Q: Why were the unruly people no longer allowed in the bar owned by an Oscar winning Spanish actor?
A: Javier Bardem.
Wednesday, 27 January 2010
Topical Football Joke (sort of)
Q. What do grandma-shagging Wayne Rooney and Rafa Benitez have in common?
A. They both like a bit of the Old Lady
Wednesday, 20 January 2010
Crystal Not-So-Amazing
Q: Why does Richard O'Brien always leave the pub at last orders?
A: Because he hates lock-ins.
Tuesday, 19 January 2010
Crystal Amazing No. 4
Q: Where would Richard O'Brien go if he wasn't bald and wanted a really cool hair do?
A: The Fro-Zone.
Crystal Amazing No.3
Q: How Richard O'Brien get from North Korea to South Korea?
A: He goes through the Demilitarized Zone.
Crystal Amazing No.2
Q: How does Richard O'Brien win Irish singing crystals?
A: He goes to the Boy Zone.
Monday, 18 January 2010
Friday, 15 January 2010
Special offer joke! 2-4-1!
Q: Where in London can you go and look at David Cameron, Boris Johnson and George Osborne?
A: The Greenwich Observe a Tory.
Q: Where in London can you go and look at Oaks, Beeches, Larches and Weeping Willows?
A: The Greenwich Observe a Tree.
Two of the price of one for you!
Thursday, 14 January 2010
Wednesday, 13 January 2010
A Smorgasbord of Football
Q: What is the most unappetising thing you can be served in the FIFA headquaters canteen?
A: Sepp Platter.
GOLAZO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Q: How do you make an Irishman cry?
A: Knock them out of the World Cup with a handball assist.
The Greengrocer of Doom
Q: What do you call a gloomy vegetable?
A: A Melancholyflower.
A big thank you to miss Teri Rosenbaum for that.
Friday, 8 January 2010
Tuesday, 5 January 2010
Wednesday, 30 December 2009
I like this one
Why was the morbid ancient Egyptian ruler offered a member of his court to fellate while he was planning a double funeral for himself and his Queen?
Because he said he wanted two sarcophagi
Thursday, 24 December 2009
La la la
Q: Why did the pop starlett have a bloody nose and bogies on her fingers?
A: Because she Pixie Lott.
Tinky-Winky, Blitzkrieg, La La... Po
Why did the Israeli secret service arrest one of the Teletubbies when he appeared on another children's programme?
Because they were after the guest-star-Po
Wednesday, 23 December 2009
The blog seems to be dying, hopefully this death based joke will save it.
Q: What did Haley Joel Osment say when walking through a graveyard on a frosty morning?
A: Icy dead people.
Thursday, 3 December 2009
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