Thursday, 26 April 2007

Garfunkel Must Feel Left Out

Q: How does Paul Simon show his solidarity to Arabic TV stations?

A: By singing "You can call me Al Jazeera".

Thursday, 19 April 2007

The Way Things Are Going

Tuesday, 17 April 2007

Corporate Fraud Is All The Rage

Q: Why did Mitsubishi and JVC get sent down?

A: Because Samsung like a fucking canary.

Monday, 16 April 2007

Ooooh, Not So Good

Q: Where in Portugal does everyone have a speech impediment?

A: Lispbon.

Sunday, 15 April 2007

Hit Me With Your Rhythm Sticks

Q: Which country has the best rhythm section in the world?

A: Bongolia.

Migratory Espionage

Saturday, 14 April 2007

Barrel, Scraped

Q: What do roads and male arses have in common?

A: They both have manholes.

I am so sorry.

The Passion Of The Gym

Q: What type of yoga was popular in ancient Judea?

A: Pontius Pilates.

In The Navy, Again

Q: Why is Lionel Ritchie always saluted to by sailors?

A: Because he was a Commodore.

Thursday, 12 April 2007

Wednesday, 11 April 2007

Jab, Jab, Block, Jab, Jab, Inoculate Bird Flu

Q: What division do chickens box in?

A: Bantamweight.

Tuesday, 10 April 2007

Off Broadway, Offensive

Q: Did you hear about Panzer! The Musical?

A: It tanked.

Veni, Vidi, Vomiti

Q: Why were The Romans so cheeky?

A: Because they had a lot of Gaul.

California: Potty Mouths

Fondue Fire Fighting

Q: Where is Switerland's worst fire service?

A: Berne.

Monday, 9 April 2007

Sorry, You're Breaking Up

Q: Where is the highest concentration of cellphones in the US?

A: Mobile, AL

Ich Bin Ein Heffer

Q: Where in Germany are people constantly eating?

A: Munchen.

Je Suis Une Plaisanterie

Q: Why are the people of Haute-Garonne desperately poor but always struggle on?

A: Because they have nothing, Toulouse.

Sunday, 8 April 2007

Works Better When Said, But Not By Much #3

William Tells Me This Joke, Right?

Q: Where does Gioacchino Rossini get his hair cut?

A: From the Barber of Seville.

Psychoanalytic Clothing

Q: What does Sigmund's wife wear under her clothes?

A: A Freudian Slip.

Sir Richard Branson's Pickle

Q: Why do Virgin Airlines really believe in flying to Tokyo?

A: Because they're in it for the long haul.

Thursday, 5 April 2007

Partisan Artisan

Q: What do you call an angry Lalique?

A: Tempered Glass.

Courtesy of Brad "Rather Camp" Le Riche. Thanks chap!

In The Navy

Q: Who are the meanest naval people?

A: Petty Officers.

Wednesday, 4 April 2007

Neapolitan Cleavage

Q: Why do Italians have the best breasts?

A: Because they have fantastic Naples.

Tuesday, 3 April 2007